"The Talk," Music & Fashion

Where do I begin? It's been an eye-opening week with Alec.

First, after reading the joke edition of the Reader's Digest, he was telling me some jokes he had read. One of them required the understanding of an alternative lifestyle to be funny. So after he told me the joke and he laughed and asked me if I understood it, I in turn asked if he understood what it meant. This led to my realizing that he knows a lot more about the birds and the bees than I was ready for him to know.

I explained to him what were and were not appropriate relationships, plan of salvation, Adam & Eve, etc. Then I told him he could ask me anything he wanted to know about, even words he had heard, and I won't get mad. I just want to be the one to explain things to him, not his friends. So he says, "You mean like how you get a baby?"

Okie-dokie. I was ready. "Tell me what you know" is what I said -- and he did. He used some terms that I tried not to cringe at and he was very open with me. Then as I'm explaining how there are some words we just don't ever say, he replies, "Like that word?" Low and behold, the car right in front of us had a curse word written in the dust in the back window. Oh, what a perfect example. "Yes, dear, that's one of those bad words we don't use."

It was a perfect night for the talk, because Sophia was at a sleepover, so I took him and Selena to TGIF for dinner and I answered his questions as we drove, keeping it age appropriate, sparing him too many details and always emphasizing these things are for married people only.

Then today he tells me he wants some name-brand clothes. What? This from the boy who lives in t-shirts and I have to beg him to change those? He wants Polo shirts. I said, "You have plenty of shirts with collars." No, he means the Polo brand.

I told him if he wants to spend his own money on one shirt and be broke, fine. But I'm not paying for a logo on a shirt.

It doesn't end there. He then goes on to explain that all his friends talk about, sing, do the dances from videos of songs that he's never heard of. He's feeling out of the loop. I know this is true because he only listens to my music -- '80's, oldies, musicals, etc. I do feel for him, because I remember listening to the Top 40 when I was young and singing along to The Thompson Twins, Duran Duran, Culture Club, Journey.... and realizing Alec knows none of the current songs.

So today after school I took the three kids to the mall. We had a fun dinner, each of us picking a different place in the food court to eat from. Then Alec got his hair cut and styled in one of the salons by a man with hair down to his waist. Sophia couldn't believe it was a man because his hair was so long. Alec was beaming after the cut, because he loved how it stuck up in the front.

Then off to get Sophia some head bands for her hair and some shoes.

And we then went into a music store, where I told Alec I'd see what songs he liked and maybe buy him a current cd. So he tells the worker some names of the groups and songs his friends listen to, and she said, "You shouldn't be listening to that." Apparently it was some rap songs with vulgar language. Holy cow. She then told Alec how he didn't need to listen to what his friends listened to and suggested cleaner artists, but it was still rap. I really liked her though. Needless to say, we did not buy any music. I don't know how this will turn out. So if anyone can suggest clean, cool, modern music for my young son, please let me know.

I cheered him up by buying him some new shirts that actually look nice and even have collars. Plus, JCPenney had buy one, get one for one cent, so that's nice.

The evening ended on a good note with a ride on the carousel and some Maggie Moo's to top it off.

Unfortunately, time went by way too fast and we didn't return home until 8:30. Four hours at the mall on a school night -- I think maybe next time I'll wait until the weekend.

So if anyone wants to hear a good joke, wants to be educated on appropriate relationships, wants names of rap groups, or a shopping partner, call my grown-up boy -- he's ready!