My Mom

My mom just celebrated her birthday this weekend. She spent it with her siblings who traveled from out of state to California to see her. My mother had a massive stroke a few years ago and is unable to walk or talk. But she is very aware of her surroundings and her circumstances, so seeing loved ones means the world to her.

When I was growing up some of the things I remember about my sweet mom is the fact that she got up every morning to make a hot breakfast for her children. Even when we had 6:00 seminary, she was in the kitchen making either eggs or oatmeal with bacon or spam. She had six children and was up for all of us.

She never had disposable diapers, always cloth. She rarely had a dishwasher and didn't have a microwave.

She loves Tom Selleck and was a big Magnum PI fan. She even hung a poster of him in our family room. (Dad tried to hang a poster up of Dolly Parton, but mom put a stop to that) She's watched Days of Our Lives for over 30 years. Even after her stroke she knew when it would come on and point to the clock and t.v. for my dad to turn it on for her.

I remember walking up to my house after school and smelling her cooking. She made the best homemade tortillas, beans, tacos, tamales and also made great desserts.

For our birthdays she made amazing cakes, doll shaped ones with huge dresses made out of frosting for us girls and football field ones for the boys. Our birthday parties were events. She invited all of our friends, plus their parents. There would always be a pinata and we all wore our best Sunday dresses.

I could always talk to her about anything. That's the hardest part now for me is that I can't talk to her like I used to. She can understand me, but is unable to communicate back and I know it's so frustrating for her because often our conversations end with both of us crying and I just tell her I love her and miss her so much.

There are so many times when I just need to talk to her. As I go through trials with the children and just life in general, I miss terribly just hearing her say that things are going to get better. No matter how old I am, I realize I still need and want my mom to cry to and laugh with.

I do look forward to the day, whether this life or the next, when her body is totally healed and she can be as she once was.

I am so grateful for the healthy years we did have with her and the great memories and childhood she gave me. And I am grateful that she still knows her family and does still laugh when I tell her something funny about the children. And she still gets excited and says, "Ohhhh" when I told her I sent her some Almond Joys, her favorite candy bar for her birthday.

I love you, mom.